The most overlooked exercise in every postpartum wellness program
Quick reminder: You don’t need to “get your body back”; check my previous article if you’re feeling any sort of way about your perfect post-partum body.
What’s the most overlooked exercise in any postpartum wellness program?
It’s not what you think.
It has nothing to do with how you move your body.
But it does have to do with how you treat your body.
The exercise that’s mostly ignored after birth is:
PATIENCE with your body.
Patience is particularly significant after birth.
It took roughly 9 months for your body to change in major ways in order to welcome your baby into the world.
The stress placed on your body during this large chunk of time, as well as the intensity of the birthing process, will require rehab and recovery time.
Plus, HELLO FOURTH TRIMESTER:
Lots of sitting and laying
Hunched over breastfeeding
Babywearing
Looking after other children
And not moving a muscle while sleeping, if you choose to bedshare.
Pregnancy and birthing recovery will take longer than 9 months.
How long will birthing recovery take?
It will take over two years or more to physically recover (and more years to recovery energetically).
Particularly if birthing happens again. Birth recovery greatly depends on:
your level of support,
schedule,
energy,
and conditions prior to pregnancy and during pregnancy.
YES, IT CAN SEEM OVERWHELMING AND FEEL IMPOSSIBLE.
But that's where (what I call) postpartum patience practice (PPP) comes in.
We want it fast. Right now. Minimal effort.
In our world of Amazon Prime, Netflix, and Uber Eats, we don't often have to exercise our patience.
Just like strength training is made up of exercises, a regular practice gets you results.
Patience is also an exercise. You must practice it, or you won't be very good at it.
What is postpartum patience practice (PPP)?
It's a new way of living.
Motherhood is your golden opportunity to practice patience in so many ways, particularly with your little one(s).
But to extend this patience to yourself, to your body, is a true act of self-love and acceptance.
HOW DO YOU PRACTICE PATIENCE WITH YOUR BODY?
The same way you practice patience with anything else. Here are 3 great ways to start:
BE MINDFUL OF YOUR IMPATIENCE.
Slow down.
Take deep breaths.
Practice mindfulness (and meditation). This will help you become better at identifying your thoughts as separate from who you truly are. You are not your thoughts.
Headspace is a great app for mindfulness.
Some of their meditations use noting; a technique used to practice identifying (or noting) your thoughts as simply content passing through.
By noting when you are treating yourself unfairly ("I hate these stretch marks. Bleh, this cellulite.") and identifying when you are not appreciating who, what, and where you are currently, it somehow becomes easier to give yourself some grace.
You are able to surrender to the flow of life rather than resist it and try to control it.
2. PRACTICE GRATITUDE FOR WHAT IS.
When you move into the energy of gratitude, you are appreciative of what is.
Gratitude helps to relieve impatience or the desire to change things about yourself or your situation.
Affirmations are an easy way to move into gratitude. Try these post-birth affirmations.
3. SHOWING APPRECIATION FOR YOUR BODY.
While gratitude allows you to accept your body, showing appreciation supports taking care of your body.
The body that, as we've already discussed, is a reservoir of comfort, support, and life-giving for your baby. Now it is more important than ever to show your body appreciation and care.
There are so many ways to show your body appreciation.
ACTS OF BODILY APPRECIATION
Drink enough water.
Move more throughout your day
Follow body-positive social accounts (#bodypositive) like the one below
Click photo to read her full caption.
"BUT ANGELA, I CAN'T HELP IT, I DO WANT MY BODY BACK!"
I hear you loud and clear. There are things I want back too.
I want strong arms and good posture.
I want to do heavy-ass hip thrusts and unassisted pullups.
I want to run an easy 5 km.
I want these skin tags gone.
I want these new moles to go away.
I want the brown spots on my face to disappear.
I want my boobs back so I can wear my lacey bralets.
But these are just passing thoughts. I don't take them too seriously. They do not define me. They are not who I truly am, so I don't put much stock in them.
If you've had a baby, there's no need to dwell on these types of thoughts.
No need to allow them to turn into sadness, regret, grief, shame, or any other fear-based emotion surrounding the changes to your body.
By all means, feel those things if they come up, but know there's no need to stay there and identify with those feelings. Again, you are not your thoughts.
Your body is AMAZING. IT CREATED A HUMAN. IT BROUGHT A NEW SOUL INTO THE WORLD. Your body is badass forever more.
PLUS, IT'S ACTUALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO "GET YOUR BODY BACK." AND THAT'S OKAY.
IN FACT, IT'S NORMAL.
HERE ARE 5 PERMANENT BODILY CHANGES CAUSED BY PREGNANCY.
WIDER HIPS
Some women will say their hips feel wider, but it's actually their pelvis that has changed structure.
When the baby goes through the birth canal, it changes the bone structure slightly.
While some women don't notice a change, others do. They feel their jeans fit differently.
2. CHANGE IN BREASTS
Around one-third of women will end up with smaller boobs, one-third will end up with larger breasts, and the rest will basically go back to the same size pre-pregnancy. However, they still may look different. See 3.
3. DARKER AREOLA, LABIA, AND MOLES
Due to high levels of estrogen during pregnancy, these areas darken and may stay that way after birth.
4. STRETCH MARKS
While stretch marks can fade over a period of a year or two after birth, they will never fully disappear. They are completely normal. Remember, photos are photoshopped!!
Click photo to read her full caption.
5. PERMANENT BRAIN CHANGES
This may not be as noticeable because you cannot see it with your eyes, but you may feel it. There are changes in the neuronal network during pregnancy and in motherhood too.
In fact, new mothers showed evidence of neural remodeling up to two years after giving birth.
Researchers have discovered that new mothers experienced gray matter reductions that lasted for at least two years after birth.
This loss occurred in brain regions involved in social cognition, which helps us think about what is going on in someone else’s mind.
Thank goodness because we need to figure out what our little ones need!!
Truly, the concept of "getting our bodies back" after having babies is a futile exercise.
This cultural myth that our bodies should remain the same over time and that any changes, such as gaining weight, signs of aging or disability, are a “failure” on our behalf.
We are human beings — our bodies evolve and change. We can’t make them go backwards.
"How do I get my body back after pregnancy and birth?" derives from this yearning to go backwards and to be as one was before.
And in this case, we are simply not meant to look the same as we did in high school until the end of our lives!
This is again where your patience and gratitude come in.
SO, WHAT'S A BETTER QUESTION TO ASK YOURSELF AFTER PREGNANCY AND BIRTH?
"How do I move forward and create a healthy and capable body that allows me to serve my family, friends, and community?"
Successful physical recovery postpartum requires a phased approach.
It can be broken down into 3 different phases.
Phase One: Rehab and Retraining
Phase Two: Return to Exercise
Phase Three: Bulletproofing Your Body
Together these phases will likely take multiple years depending on the mama’s support level.
Current guidelines recommend that it is safe to return to physical activity, work, and intercourse 6 weeks after delivering a baby (8-12 weeks, if c-section).
However, without a proper plan in place to physically rehab and retrain your body during those first 6 weeks, moms risk doing more harm than progress.
During this time, it is important to rest as much as possible and only perform gentle movements within these first 6 weeks.
If your energy or schedule does not allow for it, then that retraining period (phase one) will have to be extended beyond the 6-week mark.
Below you'll find Phase One of the postpartum fitness journey to download.
It will help you through the foundational steps required before you return to light exercise.
What’s inside?
(Re)Connecting with your pelvic floor (great for everyone, not just postpartum)
How to perform the connection breath (great for everyone, not just postpartum)
6 weeks of safe exercises (broken down into 2-week intervals)
Example circuit with exercise explanations
TAKE THE TIME TO SHOW YOUR BODY SOME APPRECIATION AND LOVE. YOU DESERVE IT! And remember, your baby loves your body and you should too!